I Need A Vacation From Life.
If we could just escape from the crowd .
What about your goals? drives, He pushes me and my wrist so tightly that I think it will break. He shook me and scared I look into his green eyes that seem much darker than usual clouds are drawn and the darkness seems so unapproachable cold, so awful. I'm afraid, but maybe that is because he is so loud and his voice drives me through the entire body. Where's the girl I've got here then?
"You've lost it", I think. To pronounce it as my strength not more, I will also not give me the nakedness before him and he confirmed that my voice trembles. But he does know it anyway.
How can you so you can go!
I can not cry once, when his free hand strikes against my head. The force behind my tears almost from the legs, but he still holds my wrist and I fall only half would be torn from him again in the air - it runs in my shoulder. That's why I close my eyes. All of a sudden I'm quite calm. I am calm and I enjoy how the pain is pulsating spread. Such as heat, he met me and envelops me. My Inability to have control is balanced by the clarity that brings this tear in my body. But the second in which I hinfortträume lasts, too short and soon I shall be shaken so hard that I open my eyes again.
"I can not."
He has already read the words from the soul. Talking to him I can not. The pressure that squeezes together my chest has made me the voice. My tongue is sewn and does not move, in my neck are the vocal chords scratched and tear.
You are SO pathetic! He insulted me and I never look at him, to see exactly what makes sure that he is so different. His face is unchanged, but his eyes ... they are filled with more and more dark and his eyes are as sharp that I feel to bleed it.
"I have never claimed otherwise."
And for these words, he pushes me to the ground by hand. I know why. I am not entitled to so as to talk about myself. He may, but I myself do not. I should listen to me, but that speak of myself is taboo.
What about what you've done to you! You'll get up and fight now!
Unfortunately he tells me how to do that if he never ceases to press the earth. Sharp stones cut myself, but I enjoy it. Maybe he knows that as long as he does it all here with me, I do not act. And I dare not to act anymore. It makes me a bad person, but I suppose tacitly accepted.
Ich verstehe seine nächsten Sätze nicht. Alles, was ich verstehe ist, dass er mich anschreit, minutenlang anschreit und schlägt. Er verprügelt mich, wie es mir nie widerfahren ist. Ich kann sagen, dass das etwas ist, womit ich vor allem an diesem Ort nicht gerechnet habe. Aber ich kann nicht sagen, dass ich sein Verhalten ungerechtfertigt finde.
Was auch immer er ausspricht. Ich weiß, dass es keine Vorwürfe sind, sondern die Wahrheit ist.
Wenn die Wahrheit so schrecklich ist, dass sie beleidigend wirkt, dann liegt das in meiner Verantwortung. Dann ist das meine Schuld. Und deswegen hat er jedes Recht, so mit mir umzugehen.
Genießt you know? asks, and I can feel his breath on my face. He has thus bending over me and I know he is smiling. you appreciate it that I just do it this way? The role of victim. Is there something easier? Rejoice! You be thankful that I'm so ready a perfect escape route! Self-pity. Feels good, right?
I say nothing. "Yes," I answer then silence.
"It's all I have because I guess the rest yourself."
It can depend on me, turns around. He makes my wrist and Loss of a sudden I feel terribly alone. His contempt
hits me more than any shock and hurt me more than anything before.
And then - then I did not care.
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